Forgiving others is a challenge. Advising others to forgive someone can set off a canon. Nevertheless, I have found that learning how to forgive does more good for us than holding on to grudges, and having bitterness. No one likes to be wronged, but it is going to happen to all of us. Being unforgiving is unhealthy for us. The longer we hold on to the wrong that has been done to us the more it becomes a chain we can't break free from.
So here are just a few tips to remember when someone has wronged you.
1. FORGIVE QUICKLY
The best way to do this is to think about forgiveness from God's perspective. If we don't see forgiveness from God's perspective we can easily justify harboring ill feelings and try to make someone pay for what they did to us. We want to make sure certain conditions are met, that the person will never do it again. That's why we need to think about it from God's perspective. Have you met the standard that you put on others when it comes to wanting God to forgive you? Or let me ask it this way, what if God put the same standard on you as you do with others before you forgive them? Would you ever experience God's forgiveness?
bearing with one another, and
forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as
the Lord forgave you, so also should you.
Colossians 3:13
2. YOU ARE GOING TO NEED FORGIVENESS EXTENDED TO YOU AT SOME POINT
We often forget that we are going to wrong others. Maybe not intentionally but it will happen, and we will need someone to forgiveness to us. And of course we will need God to extend forgiveness to us. Sometimes we dwell on the wrongs that have been done to us that we tend to forget or think lightly of the wrongs that we have done to others. Jesus put it this way:
Give, and it will be given to you. They will pour into your lap a good measure--pressed down, shaken together, and running over. For by your standard of measure it will be measured to you in return.
Luke 6:38
3. FORGIVENESS IS A LIFESTYLE
Extending or receiving forgiveness goes on constantly in our lives. As we remember to see things from God's perspective, and as we see our need for forgiveness, we begin to make forgiveness a lifestyle. We learn to not hold grudges. We extend forgiveness to others and others extend forgiveness to us.
Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
Ephesians 4:32
Troy